It is easier to count the material things you don't have in life then the things you have. So I have come up with a list of i don'ts:
1) I don't have an Audi TT for my car
2) I don't have a house in Bukit Timah Sixth avenue.
3) I don't have any money left in the bank at the end of every month.
4) I don't have a job that pays me obscene amount of money and 2 digit bonuses (at least 10 months) at the end of the year
5) I don't have a killer scupltured body that is the envy of all mankind.
I can continue the list till the list reaches 100, but i will not indulge myself. There are many things in life that you may lack.
Material lack is the absence of something. You will only lack when you have the knowledge of the "thing" in the first place. How much emotions will this item stir within you determine the so called "passion" you have to get it and that is the reason why passion differs from person to person.
So does lack create a desire or do your desires find a lack in your life? Its all about perception. Your perception becomes your reality. Yours alone. You shape the wants and desires in your life. What motivates you. What drives you. Some see money as the means to lead a good life and others see it as a means to get by and support their family. I see my Audi TT as a luxury but there may be someone out there who will die for it as it is beyond luxury but a sense of achievement.
So what shapes your perception? What goes in must come out. What you feed your mind will determine what will come out of it. Your wants, your ideas, your visions. So i say watch what you eat, and i mean both physically and mentally. Thats why the good book says, Faith comes from hearing and hearing the Word of God. And without faith it is impossible to please God. What are you feeding yourself today?
Tuesday, 29 January 2008
Friday, 25 January 2008
Keep it light hearted
Just yesterday i was told by one of my friend to start blogging something more light hearted rather than expound on deep thoughts and irrational and disgusting human behaviour. Behaviours that are displayed by human specimens such as myself that seems unacceptable in her eyes.
Although she thinks that i am gay and full of myself, i shall comply and blog on more light hearted topics. She happens to be a long time friend of mine so i will not record her name in my little black book and reveal who she is ... oops did i just reveal her gender... oh and btw her name sounds like a genre of music.... no i don't have a friend name pop.... think Diana Krall. Yes yes and she has a stupid dog at home as well and she gets on everyones nerve once in a while. In fact she has 2 dogs...
Back to my point, let me try blogging about my day... hmmm lets see, i had a chicken leg for lunch covered with some herb sauce at ikea... i was having lunch with my twin sister and someone from the media. Very interestingly, she had a niece 5 years old who has an imaginary boyfren call Raver who is 28 years old and drives a light red car... its pretty weird for a kid to conjure up an imaginary boyfren like that don't you think. I had 2 cups of coffee with 2 packs of sugar. I didn't shop at Ikea after that and went straight to my appointment at Fullerton. The weather was hot with temperature at a high of 32 degress.
Light hearted enough.
Okay, lets face it. I can't blog light hearted stuff and i am not a blogger who blogs about my everyday life. Who needs to know anyway. In the famous words of Frank Sinatra... i did it my way!
Although she thinks that i am gay and full of myself, i shall comply and blog on more light hearted topics. She happens to be a long time friend of mine so i will not record her name in my little black book and reveal who she is ... oops did i just reveal her gender... oh and btw her name sounds like a genre of music.... no i don't have a friend name pop.... think Diana Krall. Yes yes and she has a stupid dog at home as well and she gets on everyones nerve once in a while. In fact she has 2 dogs...
Back to my point, let me try blogging about my day... hmmm lets see, i had a chicken leg for lunch covered with some herb sauce at ikea... i was having lunch with my twin sister and someone from the media. Very interestingly, she had a niece 5 years old who has an imaginary boyfren call Raver who is 28 years old and drives a light red car... its pretty weird for a kid to conjure up an imaginary boyfren like that don't you think. I had 2 cups of coffee with 2 packs of sugar. I didn't shop at Ikea after that and went straight to my appointment at Fullerton. The weather was hot with temperature at a high of 32 degress.
Light hearted enough.
Okay, lets face it. I can't blog light hearted stuff and i am not a blogger who blogs about my everyday life. Who needs to know anyway. In the famous words of Frank Sinatra... i did it my way!
Saturday, 12 January 2008
The age of innocence
At what age does the human heart become corrupted? How does one start to learnt about sex, lies and videotapes? There are various sources now that allows the human mind to see things that ten years ago does not exist. You can almost find anything on the internet nowadays, paid or not.
Let's pick a sensitive topic, Sex for example.
*Disclaimer: Although what i am about to say is highly educational, but if you are 18years and below. Please refrain from reading on.
How does a kid in Singapore find out about sex? I don't think they teach about the birds and the bees in schools. Correct me if i 'm wrong. For a guy, sex education is not an issue. Our "curiosity" aka hormones will drive us to find out all about these "birds" and "bees". In fact, we take it a step further, we will even explore the size in different scenarios and positions... you get the picture.
Now comes the question, how do the girls find out about sex? Is it through the guys that the girls find out? Or do girls just sit in circle during a slumber party and start to show each other their body parts for the sake of discussion? No, wait... thats a scene from some movie i saw last night on my computer...
What prompted me to question is the fact that i had a very interesting conversation with a couple of my friends about self pleasuring for girls. Don't ask me how the conversation got to that, and no we were not high.
Interesting enough, one of my friend have not even seen an explicit sex scene (aka soft/hardcore porn) until recently, and she was totally turn off by it. The other friend was actually turn off by the fact that women actually pleasure themselves with tools or no tools. I know it sounds totally wrong, but i tried to convince them that it is totally normal and it is pleasurable for women most of the time. Not that i want them to learnt it from me...
Both of them were not convinced. One of them even swear that if their husband in the future (now boyfriend) try to stick anything in them after they are married, they will surely find their body parts missing while they are asleep.
Although it seems unbelievable that alot of girls are not sex educated, not that i have an advance degree in sex education to begin with, but i think its true.
It seems that no one talks about it. Come to think of it, maybe its better this way, what you don't know, wouldn't hurt you, literally. I am actually proud of my 2 friends, thay have maintain their innocence in this area, and the men who will marry them in the future are truly blessed. I have two word of advice for these guys though... Metal Underwear!
Let's pick a sensitive topic, Sex for example.
*Disclaimer: Although what i am about to say is highly educational, but if you are 18years and below. Please refrain from reading on.
How does a kid in Singapore find out about sex? I don't think they teach about the birds and the bees in schools. Correct me if i 'm wrong. For a guy, sex education is not an issue. Our "curiosity" aka hormones will drive us to find out all about these "birds" and "bees". In fact, we take it a step further, we will even explore the size in different scenarios and positions... you get the picture.
Now comes the question, how do the girls find out about sex? Is it through the guys that the girls find out? Or do girls just sit in circle during a slumber party and start to show each other their body parts for the sake of discussion? No, wait... thats a scene from some movie i saw last night on my computer...
What prompted me to question is the fact that i had a very interesting conversation with a couple of my friends about self pleasuring for girls. Don't ask me how the conversation got to that, and no we were not high.
Interesting enough, one of my friend have not even seen an explicit sex scene (aka soft/hardcore porn) until recently, and she was totally turn off by it. The other friend was actually turn off by the fact that women actually pleasure themselves with tools or no tools. I know it sounds totally wrong, but i tried to convince them that it is totally normal and it is pleasurable for women most of the time. Not that i want them to learnt it from me...
Both of them were not convinced. One of them even swear that if their husband in the future (now boyfriend) try to stick anything in them after they are married, they will surely find their body parts missing while they are asleep.
Although it seems unbelievable that alot of girls are not sex educated, not that i have an advance degree in sex education to begin with, but i think its true.
It seems that no one talks about it. Come to think of it, maybe its better this way, what you don't know, wouldn't hurt you, literally. I am actually proud of my 2 friends, thay have maintain their innocence in this area, and the men who will marry them in the future are truly blessed. I have two word of advice for these guys though... Metal Underwear!
Tuesday, 8 January 2008
Enough is enough!
Satisfaction in life comes in many shape and form. Most of the time, we feel that nothing is enough in life. You realise that you don't have enough in the bank. You realise that you are always hungry and never enough to eat (i speak only for myself) A car is not enough, you need a super car. A HDB flat is not enough, you need one of those houses in Bukit Timah, those fully detached ones.
The culture we live in has evolved over the years. Our society teaches us that we have to have that drive and hunger to want "it". Anything less than that is a laid back attitude that shouldn't be advocated. We learn to push ourselves hard and achieve. Believe me, there is nothing wrong with that, infact that attitude is the right attitude if that is what you want out of life.
The fact of the matter is, if "it" is what you want. Go all out and achieve "it". Whatever "it" means to you. The most important thing is that "it" has to be what you truly want and not what society imposes on you. Everybody wants to be rich. Well, most people i know wouldn't mind that. But how many people actually really want to be rich.
If money doesn't motivate you enough to do something about it, being rich is not what you really want. The question to ask yourself is, how badly do you want that money in the bank. The answer is not as straight forward as you think it is. We want what money can buy us and not money itself. Money is a means to an end and not the end itself.
We have been educated since young (at least i have) that money can get you many things if not everything. My mother always taught me that i should concentrate on earning money, lots of it before thinking about girlfriend or getting married etc. Once i have that in place girls will flock to me. (That's what she taught me, she also taught me that i need to learn how to drink and gamble) Although there is some truth in it but is that what you really want? The answer once again is not as straightforward as you think it is. Money does provide certain sense of security but it cannot be everything.
Truth be told, everyone don't mind the money but majority wouldn't break their back trying. Money is just a case in point. It could be career advancement that motivates you. You spent your 24/7 to get into a position of power, some are motivated by family. As long as the family is taken care of, they will go all out to ensure that.
With that in mind, know what motivates you. Use that to be a better person. Make a difference in the lives of the people around you. I am still looking for that something that drives me. All is unclear and i seem to be looking through a dim glass but i am sure it will be clear very soon. Sooner than i think it will be.
The culture we live in has evolved over the years. Our society teaches us that we have to have that drive and hunger to want "it". Anything less than that is a laid back attitude that shouldn't be advocated. We learn to push ourselves hard and achieve. Believe me, there is nothing wrong with that, infact that attitude is the right attitude if that is what you want out of life.
The fact of the matter is, if "it" is what you want. Go all out and achieve "it". Whatever "it" means to you. The most important thing is that "it" has to be what you truly want and not what society imposes on you. Everybody wants to be rich. Well, most people i know wouldn't mind that. But how many people actually really want to be rich.
If money doesn't motivate you enough to do something about it, being rich is not what you really want. The question to ask yourself is, how badly do you want that money in the bank. The answer is not as straight forward as you think it is. We want what money can buy us and not money itself. Money is a means to an end and not the end itself.
We have been educated since young (at least i have) that money can get you many things if not everything. My mother always taught me that i should concentrate on earning money, lots of it before thinking about girlfriend or getting married etc. Once i have that in place girls will flock to me. (That's what she taught me, she also taught me that i need to learn how to drink and gamble) Although there is some truth in it but is that what you really want? The answer once again is not as straightforward as you think it is. Money does provide certain sense of security but it cannot be everything.
Truth be told, everyone don't mind the money but majority wouldn't break their back trying. Money is just a case in point. It could be career advancement that motivates you. You spent your 24/7 to get into a position of power, some are motivated by family. As long as the family is taken care of, they will go all out to ensure that.
With that in mind, know what motivates you. Use that to be a better person. Make a difference in the lives of the people around you. I am still looking for that something that drives me. All is unclear and i seem to be looking through a dim glass but i am sure it will be clear very soon. Sooner than i think it will be.
Wednesday, 2 January 2008
Top 10 Resolutions for 2008
i figured, heck why not... the challenge is when will these resolutions come undone:
1. Quit Drinking. (Maybe a little occasionally, if its worth it.)
2. Quit Gambling. (Lets wait and see after CNY)
3. Quit Procrastinating. (It took me 3 days after NY2008 to come up with list, not too bad by
my standards)
4. Lose the 10 kg of weight gained in 2007.
5. Pass my IPPT in April and maintain at least silver award level of fitness.
6. Clear all debts by end 2008.
7. Spend more time with Mum.
8. Spend time with friends that matters and not being a man whore.
9. Attend church every week and being an hour late doesn't count as attending.
10. Start serving in the church.
There you go, easy and painless. Next list: Top 10 broken 2008 resolutions... coming to a blog near you.
1. Quit Drinking. (Maybe a little occasionally, if its worth it.)
2. Quit Gambling. (Lets wait and see after CNY)
3. Quit Procrastinating. (It took me 3 days after NY2008 to come up with list, not too bad by
my standards)
4. Lose the 10 kg of weight gained in 2007.
5. Pass my IPPT in April and maintain at least silver award level of fitness.
6. Clear all debts by end 2008.
7. Spend more time with Mum.
8. Spend time with friends that matters and not being a man whore.
9. Attend church every week and being an hour late doesn't count as attending.
10. Start serving in the church.
There you go, easy and painless. Next list: Top 10 broken 2008 resolutions... coming to a blog near you.
Thursday, 29 November 2007
Thankfulness
Many a times in life you are so caught up with your own life that you actually miss the whole idea of living your own life. I am someone who tends to find the little black holes in life and dive head in. Sometimes its not the big events in life that trips you up.
For me its the little things, its the underachievements, the feeling that you could have done more but you didn't. The thing is this, while you are pondering over what you could have done, you have actually lost more time not doing the things you should do.
There are 2 voices in my head. One says :"Stop bitching about it and do it! Even if you fail, you have actually done something!" Another voice goes:"Why try so hard, be contented with life as it is. Life is like that, life is such, its too late anyway."
Sometimes i wonder what is wrong with me? It is not that i don't work hard or know what needs to be done with my life. It is as if there is this invisible wall that i keep running into, an inertial that stops me right in my track when i want to build up momentum.
Distractions. Many distractions. I always thought that i am someone who values time alone. But its weird that i hardly have any alone time nowadays. I can start the week with nothing to do after work and suddenly, by sunday night, i already pack 5 out of 7 days of the following week. Like i kept telling Ruth that i want to go out less often, spend more time with my mum at home, but it never happens.
Looking at my life, i should actually be thankful. I am thankful that i grew up in church since my teenage years. It taught me many valuable lessons, values and no matter how screwed up my life can be now. The foundation is already there. No matter how hard i struggle it has been cast in stone.
I am thankful that i have many friends who cares for me. Who bothers to even ask me if i am okay despite their own struggles in life.
I am thankful that i have put on 10 kg of weight for the past 2 years and not 20 kg!
I am thankful that i still have a job that allows me to pay my bill.
I am thankful that i still have my family around me.
I am thankful that my conscience is clear and i have not done anything to anyone or stabbed anyones back. Even as i write this i am looking at all the daggers behind my back.
I am thankful that though i am slightly overweight, i am healthy.
I am thankful that i have very good friends which i am very sure will be there for me to help if i ask them for help.
I am thankful that i can sleep soundly at night.
I am thankful that my body is whole.
I am thankful, truely thankful.
For me its the little things, its the underachievements, the feeling that you could have done more but you didn't. The thing is this, while you are pondering over what you could have done, you have actually lost more time not doing the things you should do.
There are 2 voices in my head. One says :"Stop bitching about it and do it! Even if you fail, you have actually done something!" Another voice goes:"Why try so hard, be contented with life as it is. Life is like that, life is such, its too late anyway."
Sometimes i wonder what is wrong with me? It is not that i don't work hard or know what needs to be done with my life. It is as if there is this invisible wall that i keep running into, an inertial that stops me right in my track when i want to build up momentum.
Distractions. Many distractions. I always thought that i am someone who values time alone. But its weird that i hardly have any alone time nowadays. I can start the week with nothing to do after work and suddenly, by sunday night, i already pack 5 out of 7 days of the following week. Like i kept telling Ruth that i want to go out less often, spend more time with my mum at home, but it never happens.
Looking at my life, i should actually be thankful. I am thankful that i grew up in church since my teenage years. It taught me many valuable lessons, values and no matter how screwed up my life can be now. The foundation is already there. No matter how hard i struggle it has been cast in stone.
I am thankful that i have many friends who cares for me. Who bothers to even ask me if i am okay despite their own struggles in life.
I am thankful that i have put on 10 kg of weight for the past 2 years and not 20 kg!
I am thankful that i still have a job that allows me to pay my bill.
I am thankful that i still have my family around me.
I am thankful that my conscience is clear and i have not done anything to anyone or stabbed anyones back. Even as i write this i am looking at all the daggers behind my back.
I am thankful that though i am slightly overweight, i am healthy.
I am thankful that i have very good friends which i am very sure will be there for me to help if i ask them for help.
I am thankful that i can sleep soundly at night.
I am thankful that my body is whole.
I am thankful, truely thankful.
Monday, 19 November 2007
枫
乌云在我们心里搁下一块阴影
我聆听沉寂已久的心情
清晰透明就像美丽的风景
总在回忆里才看的清
被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过
**********************
缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
我点燃烛火温暖岁末的秋天
极光掠过天边
北风掠过想你的容颜
我把爱烧成了落叶
却换不回熟悉的那张脸
缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
为何挽回要赶在冬天来之前
爱你穿越时间
两行来自秋末的眼泪
让爱渗透了地面
我要的只是你在我身边
**********************
被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过
在山腰间飘逸的红雨
随著北风凋零我轻轻摇曳风铃
想唤醒被遗弃的爱情
雪花已铺满了地
深怕窗外枫叶已结成冰
我聆听沉寂已久的心情
清晰透明就像美丽的风景
总在回忆里才看的清
被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过
**********************
缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
我点燃烛火温暖岁末的秋天
极光掠过天边
北风掠过想你的容颜
我把爱烧成了落叶
却换不回熟悉的那张脸
缓缓掉落的枫叶像思念
为何挽回要赶在冬天来之前
爱你穿越时间
两行来自秋末的眼泪
让爱渗透了地面
我要的只是你在我身边
**********************
被伤透的心能不能够继续爱我
我用力牵起没温度的双手
过往温柔已经被时间上锁
只剩挥散不去的难过
在山腰间飘逸的红雨
随著北风凋零我轻轻摇曳风铃
想唤醒被遗弃的爱情
雪花已铺满了地
深怕窗外枫叶已结成冰
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